You look at the bike before the cyclist… After all, the groupset choice tells you all you need to know about a person, right?
-2-
You would never even consider wearing underwear with your bib shorts and, frankly, can’t understand why anyone would even think that was weird.
-3-
Slapping on a handful of chamois cream pre-ride is second nature and not remotely gross. Until a non-cyclist points out that it’s a pretty disgusting thing to do.
-4-
Your tan lines are a badge of honour and you don’t feel a jot of embarrassment at having a torso, half thighs and biceps which are a markedly different colour from the rest of your body.
-5-
When a non-cyclist suggests you keep your bikes in the shed, and you look at them as though they’ve suggested that you throw your children out on the street.
-6-
The only time your neighbours see you is returning from a weekend ride, sweaty and Lycra-clad. You’re not sure they’d recognise you in your ‘normal’ clothes with a head of tidy hair and no helmet.
You have a sneaking suspicion that they think you are much fitter than you really are.
-7-
You think nothing of getting up at 6am for a ride because the sun’s out, and a ride on a bright morning before the traffic builds up is worth so much more than a lie in…
-8-
Your colleagues no longer ask how you what you did at the weekend: they already know what you were doing (and don’t really care about your new route/favourite cafe stop/how your new bar tape performed)
-9-
Your regular socks cost £10 for 5 pairs, and that’s plenty, thank you. However, you don’t bat an eyelid at blowing £15 on a single pair of cycling socks in just the right shade to match your bidon and cap…
-10-
When you drive up hills, you find yourself feeling cheated out of a climb. And when you drive down hills…. you feel even more cheated, and ponder just how fast you could descend on your bike…
